Jus Watchin' the Tellyvision

Furmom caughted me watchin' the Tellyvision last nite. It was stormin' outsides, all yucky and stuffs. Furmom was doin' londry, or should I say YAWN-dry. BORING. Furmom happened ta look inna sleepytime room and caughted me watchin' the tellyvision. She laffed at me like it wasn't normal fur a kitty to watch it or somethin'. 

Furmom's Poor Tazte In Bookies

 Lemme jus start off by meowin' that Furmom woodn't know a good bookie iffen it hit her right sqare in the noggin'. She started readin' this bookie called "Everything's Eventual" by Stephen King. So I thot, I mighten like to read it too, jus to see what the hype is alla bout. Let's jus say SNOOZE! I honessly don't see how Furmom reads this drivel. Or any bean fur that madder.  That paw-ticular bookie is a buncha short storiez all in one bookie. So far, I has readed two short storiez and that is all I cood handle. YUCK!  
 

One short story is 'bout a devil-man inna black suity that tries ta get the little boy. The bean man has far and flamez in his bean eyes and tries to tell the bean boy that his momma done dieded. I thinks that is NOT furry nice ta do! I mean, who does that???  I says send the devil-man strate bak to heck iffen that was, in fact, what he was.... a devil man. Everykitty knows the devil is furry, furry evil and he will lie to a kitty or a bean to git his way. 

 Then the other short story I readed was 'bout a bean man that gotted bit by a snaky while playin' golf and the venom frum the snaky made the bean man paw-alyzed. He woked up inna autopsy room and the bean expurrrts were 'bout to cut him frum stem to stern. The whole entar story was basikally 'bout the bean man not bein' able ta move and the doktors were 'bout to do a autopsy on him and there wasn't not a thing in the worl' he could do 'bout it. Then at the last minute, another doktor comed in and told them, WAIT, DON'T CUT HIM OPEN! HE IS JUST PLAYIN' POSSUM! Well, not in those werds exactlee, but similar anyways.

First, why do beans even PLAY golf? That has gots to be one of the dumbest aktivities I ever saw. Sekond, why didn't the dummy bean golfy man LOOK where he was goin' and not go into the weedz where there could be snakes? Anykitty knows snakes likes ta stay and hide out in tall weeds and that's exactlee where the bean man went to. Dumb, stoopid, brainless bean man. 

So I guess yous could say I am not a fan of this Stephen King like mine Furmom is. I don't see what she and other beans sees in him. Everthing he writes seems to be witless drivel. I mean, a car that comes ta life and kills beans??? A huge dawg that gets rabeez frum a raccoon and traps beans inna car for days & days???? I thinks I could write better stuffs than that wif my eyes closed and my paws tied up wif pastel yellow yarns. 

Autum Wether



It is startin' to feel like fall these dayz.  Furmom says I haf onlee lived thru one fall so fur, and this will be my sekund. I don't mind fall. I is, affer all, a inside kitteh. Wot I don't like, howefur is WINTUR! Eben tho I don't haf to go outside in the wintur 'less I wants to, I still don't likes it coz it makes everone sad and dupressed and a kitty can't sees the grassies outside and not many birdies come to visit.



I thinks me and my Furmom shood jus take off fur a tropikal eye-land and furget abouts alla wintur time. Jus come bak wen it is warm agin and the birdies and jumpy-froggies come out to play.

Resty Time

Affer alla crazeeness latlee, I jus wanted to rests. It jus happened to be on Ashlee's softy pillo. Ahhhh... ZzZzZzZzZzZz. Sooooo comfies!

Thank Hebbens I Made It Out Alive!!!!!!

Dis is me affer "the sleepober of this past Friday nite." Furmom's step-dotters ducided to haf a payjamma party. Dis hadda be the LOWDEST, most CRAZIEST, NERB-RAKKING party EBER. Did I menshun it was LOWD? I am used to sum lowd. But not DAT much lowd!  There were five girl beans that spended the nite wif Karlee & Ashlee. I neber seen so much crazee in one place befur. I din't dare post a bloggie over the weak-end coz iffen I was still fur too long, it coulda ben bad. I meen reely bad, like losin' all your furs bad. That's how bad it coulda ben.

Them girl beans made such a mess hole of the hous that I thot Furmom was gonna haf to take herseff to the 'mergencee room. There were payper plates and plastik bowls skattered everyplace a kitty cood see. Their bean beddytime rooms were trashed wif not one thing in place like it was s'posed to be. Sumhows, Ashlee wound up wif generik mussle-rub creme in her eyeball, like Icy Hot Furmom sed. Now tell me how THAT happent? The beans SED it was a aksident, but do YOU beleef them? Sumthin fishy went on iffen you ask me.

Needlez to say, I hid UTB as much as I possiblee cood. Furmom tooked me out by the new fire pit thingy fur a bit, but she holded me so nuffin ----or noONE---cood git me. It was nice sittin wif Furmom by the fire, but man oh man, was I eber nervus about one of those bean kids gittin' hold of me. I don't know iffen I cood wifstand anofur sleepover eber. Like neber, eber. Not eben eber. Whewwww...

Door Play

This mernin', Furmom was gettin' reddy fur werk & I felt like playin'. I wood bring her my favrit toy, she wood throw it, I wood retreev it, then bring it bak and drop it at her paws so she cood throw it agin.  Then she wasn't throwin' it quik enuff, so I ducided to play wif the door. Hey, I know how to innertain myself! I don't ALWAZE need Furmom to haf funs!

Furmom wood tuch my pawsie and I wood jerk it bak unner the door reel quik-like. It was a pretty fun game!

Tuezday Funs

I felt like exxercisin' while Furmom was on her treddy-meal.

Then I hadda take a brake.

Herez me wif my favrit toy in my mouf. I takes it to Furmom & she throws it. Over & over agin like how dogs do.

Herez ANOVER snake we saw yesserday. It was tryin' to get in the hous wen Furmom was takin' in grosherries.  What is a kitty to do?? That makez 2 snakes in about 2 weeks. Sheesh.